Monday, September 12, 2011

The four merry gentlemen



I was looking directly at the Shadow’s eyes, delirious of the pleasure engulfing as It thrust in various invading rhythm. The world was shaking, twirling as it spiraled in multi-colors and scent. In one hulking ripple, the Shadow groaned and let out a gasp of air as It collapses gently beside me, eyes shut. 

I stared at Its heaving chest, unsure of what’s going on inside. 

“I love you,” I said without knowing what it meant or how I would I want it to mean. It was barely a whisper. 

The Shadow did not answer. 

“I love you,” I repeated not knowing why I did, still without knowing what it meant or how I would want it to mean. 

The Shadow did not answer. 

___

“Hello,” it was 2.30 in the morning, which would explain the hoarse tone of my voice and the blatant taste of irritation that goes with it.

“Who is this?”

“I am Destiny,” said a heavy-airy voice on the other line.

“Who is this again?”

“I am Destiny, and today is your lucky day.”

“What?”

“All you have to do is say ‘I love you’ and I’m all yours honey.”

“What?”

“Just say you love me.”

“Fuck you.”

___

“Désolé Boy, I would like you to meet Heureux Boy.”

It all started with that introduction and since then, we've been going out a lot for the past weeks. [This would explain my trouble at home since the household is becoming stricter on me lately, I can barely understand why. But of course, I can always find a way.] 

Everything is going smooth between me and Heureux Boy. Just one thing, though. Aside from our fascination with anything French (look at our names, silly) there is nothing more that is common in our list of interests. 

He hates my writing. Except for news and commentary articles, he said they were nothing but opéra interminable or in English, endless runs of operas. 

In retaliation, I would often sneer at his naivety. He’s too simple minded and I would often find myself hating his guts. I mean, why would you even bother bite at a grocery cashier’s attempt of conversation? 

It’s not that I am jealous or anything. I’m saying this because that’s how he would often accuse me and of course I would deny it vehemently. Consequently, he would laugh hard and I would become more annoyed than ever. 

But truth is I love being with Heureux Boy. One time he asked me, “do you love me?” It puzzled me since I’ve never seen him that serious, like all the puns left his goofy face at once. 

“Of course I do,” I answered truthfully. 

“One day, we’ll go to Paris and we’ll live there forever.” 

“Tu promets?”

“C’est promis.”

___

Have you ever been in love with a Donkey? I've been in love with a Donkey once. Now, if you are thinking that this is a metaphorical Donkey, I’m gonna have to break that theory of yours this early on. I am talking about a real wild Donkey here. It’s true and in all seriousness, I’m telling you now that I've been in love with a Donkey. Once. 

It’s not too different being in love with a Donkey from being in love with a human. As a matter of fact, I once dated a Pig, but that’s a whole ‘nother story. Anyway, the Donkey has been a good companion at the beginning. It would never give me the usual “donkey-sneer,” you know how donkeys seem to have this usual irritating face that feels like they’re sneering at you? It never showed me that. I was pleased. 

The Donkey’s herd is composed of great donkeys. Gentleman donkeys, I prefer to call them. They are far from being handsome, as no donkey ever looked good in human’s eyes anyway. But I’m fascinated and some were really good to me. 

One night, finally, we decided to push forward our relationship and have sex. I stood there naked in front of the Donkey and for some unknown reason, it ran away and never came back. A few days later, I received an e-mail from the Donkey telling me how ashamed it was. It said it never wanted to have sex in the first place and it realized that night that it doesn't have any romantic inclination towards me. 

I was devastated. But what I've learned in this whole Donkey love affair is that donkeys will always be donkeys. At the end, donkeys belong to the wild and that humans, like me, deserve the city. 

I don’t know, maybe I’m wrong but from the last I've heard, the Donkey just broke up with another human and is now dating fellow donkeys again. 

15 reaction(s):

the green breaker said...

I remember The Ghost In Love. Thank you for making me smile, this is enough to make my week. =)

Nate said...

@Rorschach: what the?! :|

Nate said...

@Rorschach: di ako maka-getover sa donkey.. :P

Bino said...

di ko alam kung ano ikokomento ko. maganda ang pagkakagawa honestly. well basahin ko na lang ulit. utang muna ang koment

Leah said...

Aww... somehow, napangiti ako dito. Hehe.. about you and this Heureux Boy. Sabi nga, kapag mahal mo.. kahit na naiinis ka sa kanya, kahit na naiinis din sya sayo.. like you dais, you even hate his guts sometimes.. pero mahal mo. Mahal mo eh, ganun lang kasimple yn.. Awwwww....

I love it that you have plans.. real or reel.. to go to Paris. Awwwww (again..)... :)

Oh wait a sec.. a donkey? seriously? a donkey??? hehehe..

Oh that's s true.. donkeys will always de donkeys.

oh well..

tim said...

Coolest post from you- atleast for now there is no horny matters.. hahaha

ıǝɹɯɐı said...

you never fail to amaze me. chos. hehe. keep it up :)

Leo said...

so you almost committed bestiality with the donkey? haha. just kidding. :) lol.

KikomaxXx said...

heheh made me smile :)

Mugen said...

Eww Bestiality. Hehe.

You should learn to smell the wild animals, from a distance. And yes, its impossible to domesticate one.

Viktor Saudad said...

"Bonjour Paris~!"
one day I'll be singing on top of my lungs as I dance around the Eiffel tower.

On a another note...
You seem to breathe love. Good for you. Someday, I shall breathe again.

imsonotconio said...

hmmmmmm donkey eh? hmmmmmmm

bien said...

Si DB at ang mga kakaiba nyang entries.
Naalala ko bigla yung Dante's Inferno blog mo.
Sayang, di mo nakita yung sa donkey lolz

citybuoy said...

The first and second part feels like it's all part of the gay life. Which is sad really if you think about it. We all start off being optimistic but then the process somehow jades us.

The donkey part reminds me of how Murakami talks to cats.

RoNRoNTuRoN said...

Ang best nung unang part. Yun yung naka catch ng attention ko. chos. No Im not a perv!

Ayiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii....


yihhhhhheeeeeeeeeeeeeeee... chos!

 

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